In praise of OG Anunoby’s stifling defense

OG Anunoby thieves. This guy takes. He’s here to foil plans, steal bags, and flee the crime with his belongings. In search of the real Horween. OG the bandit. OG the Desperado. OG the marauding dromaeosaurid. A real workaholic. Always on duty, protecting the other team’s best player and unleashing his silent hell. Anunoby ambushes criminals. Constructs roving no-dribble zones. He breathes his duties, his defense on the ball is a monument to imprisonment. He’s not the overseer. He is the walls.

Below are some of his defensive highlights. Some tips to improve the viewing experience:

  1. Dress like a buccaneer, a swashbuckler, any looter really. Wool pants, maybe a shirt you stole from a ship you just plundered. Possible Accessories: Knives, daggers, axes, halberds, spontons, swords (no cutlasses, cutlasses are pretentious unless they’re made of lava – get something rad like a machete), matchlock muskets, flintlock pistols, gold hoop earrings, cocked hats, Bandanas, skull rings, eye patches, a parrot. The parrot should be real. If the bird is fake, so are you.
  2. Build a small flyboat or pinnace. name it The silent killer. Paint it red.
  3. sit inside Recite the Defender’s Creed three times: Give me that. Give me that. Give me that.
  4. To smoke a cigarette. Do it like Sam Shepard asked fool for love be performed-continuously, without a break. Think about the people you love and those who have wronged them.
  5. A shot of Crown Royal and watch as Werner Herzog listens grizzly man Tape.
  6. slap you in the face
  7. call you beautiful
  8. Turn on the smoke machine and tattoo cobras on your chest. At least two. No more than seven. Use blood from cobras you killed. If the blood is fake, so are you.
  9. Another shot of Crown. hit a shark Paint it red.
  10. Turn on laser (we recommend zero variance for smaller setups).
  11. Think of those who have wronged you.
  12. Three more shots of Crown. Powerbomb a bull. Paint it red.
  13. slap you in the face
  14. call you beautiful
  15. Turn on Ante Up.
  16. Yell “Pull off minks” and supplex a lion. Paint it red.
  17. slap you in the face
  18. call you beautiful
  19. light your hair
  20. Press start.

Mike Judge once said, “Stealing gets you far in life. Actually, it’s weird to get away with it.” Anunoby took those words to heart. Sometimes he wakes up as if he could see into the future. get sloppy near him and you are cooked He treats the unprepared with the utmost And where are you thinking?

The jack-of-all-trades forward has been leading the league at 2.4 per game since Tuesday afternoon. Racking up takeaways doesn’t automatically make someone a good defender — mindless play can kill a defense — but Anunoby isn’t just about the steals, not just solid on the ball. He is starved off, stop hunt to possession. Anunoby is brutal and multidimensional. For years. Versatility is the Raptors’ luxury. Makes attacks miserable whether he’s the main defender or a helper. Can this be tip of the spear or nothing shots on the rim. Can hang on the perimeter with guards or hit the post with bigs. anunobia bustle, chasing boys. He chases pickaxe shooters and gets in fast lanes. Sometimes he looks like one Security to bait a quarterback, Polamalu of basketball. Sometimes he just shows up as if out of the fog. Sometimes he abuses you and looks bored.

Anunoby is a master of disruption and a certified nuisance. The footwork is crazy, so are the hands. He’s long been a nightmare for opposing teams because he makes himself felt whether he’s involved in offense or not. He’s been very active lately. Lately he singed. Injuries to Pascal Siakam, Precious Achiuwa and Otto Porter Jr. have increased his consumption and he has responded in kind. In his last five games, he’s averaged 20 points, 4.6 rebounds and 3.2 assists on over 17 shots per game. He hits 47% from the field, 85% from the free throw line and gets people in the ring.

He’s smart, he’s long, he’s strong. He has top-notch, upper-middle-class Dwight shoulders and his bird can sing. Comes into an attitude and into his man’s skin. Corral’s top scorers in Anunoby’s Traveling Torture Dungeon, take what they love most. OG Swole G will surely be deleted. You can find him on the wing building caves out of steel. You can find him pushing space rocks out of the mesosphere. You’ll find him haunting offense – undead, super pretty Shadow who says something when he feels like it.

On Halloween he had a steel against De’Andre Hunter, who made Alvin Williams say, “Look at him getting employed!” and Matt Devlin growl, “The power play.” He finished the night with six steals and two blocks, stuffing Atlanta into his personal boo box. Content included various scorpions, cacti, five bone mums and two skeletons. Anunoby terrorized the Hawks throughout the game. They received no mercy, no comfort, no hope. He gave them a body, tricked them and took their treats.

That’s good broken bones.

Anunoby is not surprised by any of this. He knows how good he is.

“I mean defensively, I’ve always wanted to be defensive player of the year. I always thought I was the best defender in the league. I thought [that] for the last, I don’t know how many years.”

He says it matter-of-factly, as if everyone should already know.

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